Finding Oneself

I do not profess to be an expert in psychological aspects of another person’s psyche or knowing why they do the things they do.  I can only share my thoughts and beliefs regarding personal experiences and how I found the answer for my needs.

Finding oneself is a challenge; especially in school where being associated with the popular kids of the “in crowd” is quite desirable.  For the most part, young people are critical of themselves, which makes it that much more difficult to find their place in society.  Inferiority complexes make it doubly hard to fit in.

There are those that appear to have one type of personality, but sooner or later when the truth is revealed about them, they are someone altogether different than what others thought them to be.  People, in general, are not trained or privy to the whims, urges, and notions of those that may be troubled within. 

It is the norm of everyday living to rub shoulders with people as we come and go our separate ways, but seldom do we concern ourselves with the needs of others, because of busy schedules and a “care less” attitude that some people have these days.  Little thought is given to what people may be experiencing, until one day they snap and do something terrible; and later we ask, “Why did it happen?” 

For the most part, no-one is looking for the signs that relate to psychologically disturbed individuals that may be starving for affection or merely disgusted with self-esteem.  Perhaps they might be lacking intestinal fortitude to pull themselves up by their own bootstraps to make a difference in this competitive world, or emotions were crushed do to circumstances that their coping mechanism could not deal with.

Whatever the reason, there comes a time when certain individuals throw in the towel of defeat and fly into a fit of rage, because pretending that everything is hunky-dory becomes worrisome, trite, and hypocritical in their eyes.  They say, “Enough is enough!” and then do something stupid and unforgivable.  

What makes a person do horrific things to themselves and others?  Perhaps they have medical conditions that influence their mental state of mind; or their personality traits are hard to control without proper medication.  Maybe they have been suppressed by overbearing parents or uncaring guardians; not having experienced compassion and love or given the chance to make up their own mind regarding everyday experiences.  They may have been shoved from post to pillar in foster care; moved from family to family like an old, rag doll that is handed down; not wanted.

Possibly the individuals that are bent on doing appalling things are those that choose to flush life’s values down the toilet, because their desire to belong outweighs good, sound teaching that they were taught.  In order to become part of the in-crowd or hang with gang-bangers, some feel they must turn their back on society’s regulations and blindly pursue unfamiliar territory where evil loves darkness. 

How they perceive popularity ultimately influences the path they take and the methods considered necessary to obtain this fame, thus, becoming a nonconformist or rebel; going their own way trying to find the satisfaction they lack.  Becoming a recluse and withdrawn from society is the typical progress for some.  They exist in a twisted world of their own making where self-pity rules; having a weird philosophy about life, while saturating their mind with foolish ideas of warped, unstable thinking.

I have seen children turn their back on family members and go their separate ways in search of the missing element within them.  Too often they turn to drugs, alcohol, or sexual promiscuity in an effort to fill the longing of an unquenchable thirst to belong, while sinking deeper and deeper into self-indulgent living and delusional thinking; becoming less and less involved with wholesome influences.

It seems like every time I turn on the evening news, another innocent party has been shot, stabbed, or bludgeoned to death, and the perpetrator has killed him or her self.  Could it be that the person responsible believed they them self to be a victim in this non-caring society; falling between the cracks in search of a caring person to take the time to notice them?  They needed someone to point them toward the one person that gives purpose and hope for living—Jesus Christ, the Son of God.     

These troubled souls found it easier to surrender to defeat rather than face life head-on with God’s help.  The beautiful thing about God is that He will not allow Believers-in-Christ to fall short of the mark of success.  He helps Christians to measure up and attain the expectations they set for themselves, because God wants them to be triumphant in all things.

(Philippians 4:13), “I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me.”

Our nation is in a sad state of affairs regarding children that are disobedient to parents and authority figures.  Satan is on a rampage to deceive and corrupt as many of our youth as he can, while leading them down the wide road to destruction. 

Not only do adolescent teenagers struggle with finding themselves, some adults face their share of demons as well, which are insurmountable challenges in their everyday battle of trying to find self.  The load becomes unbearable so they resort to crime and violence in an attempt to span the gap between them and contentment, having created this gap by their choices of lifestyle, while rejecting Jehovah God who is the very source of love and compassion that they seek.

They feel unaccepted and overwhelmed by loneliness in their world of dismal living.  The emptiness inside them becomes like an ulcerated cancer that is rotting their insides, because they refuse to turn their life over to Jesus Christ who is the only answer for their dilemma.

Finding oneself is synonymous with finding the Lord.  When a person accepts Jesus as Lord and Savior of their soul, they automatically find self.  Things are put into right prospective and order, because God is omnipotent; having all power to achieve such things.  He brings healing to the soul and peace to a confused mind. 

Emptiness can only be satisfied when this cavity is filled with the Spirit of God.  Nothing else will ever bring lasting contentment even though a person thinks they can attain it themselves.  Try as they might, they cannot satisfy the longing of their heart within their own shortcomings—only Jesus is capable of doing this.  He brings purpose to living and the hope of eternal life in heaven someday.

The most remarkable aspect of asking God to forgive us of our sins is that we become Christians—God’s children.  By this act of faith it enables us to become a part of a special family—the Family of God. 

Talk about belonging to something phenomenal and worth being a part of; those that have been adopted into this family become joint-heirs with Jesus Christ.  This in itself, without a doubt, is the truest sense of belonging that will ever happen to a person. 

To experience the “new-birth” of being “born-again” through Jesus’ death on the cross is unparalleled.  With this newness of life comes such a relaxing peace that it truly boggles my mind how much restful harmony accompanies Christian living.  It is a choice that I have never regretted making.  Having tried most everything that Satan tempted me with in my search for peace, I finally found myself through Jesus.

Surrendering one’s life to God, rather than giving into circumstances, produces peace beyond intellectual understanding.  You may ask, “How can a person sustain peace in adverse situations or when a loved one passes away; and how does this act of faith help me find myself?” 

The answer is simple.  Finding oneself is dependent upon the individual.  God desires that peace prevails in all humanity, but He never usurps the self-will that each person has.  It is up to you and me to choose whether or not we want to belong to the Family of God.  The fruit of the Spirit becomes the hallmark of individuals that put God first in their life.

(Galatians 5:22-23), “But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, long-suffering, kindness, goodness, faithfulness,” vs.23 “gentleness, self-control.  Against such there is no law.”   

God is the solid, unmovable foundation that Christians build upon, and Jesus is the cornerstone of the new life in Him.  The Holy Spirit is the comforter who speaks peace to God’s children when they include the Trinity in everyday tussles and struggles.

No longer do they thrash about like those that are headed down the wide road to destruction where the works of the flesh are manifested and rule a person’s life.  On the contrary, Christians walk in peace, because Jesus is the Prince of Peace.

God’s grace enables born-again Believers to put off the old nature and take on the attributes of Christ, thus, demonstrating the fruit of the Spirit in their life.  We are unable to do this alone, but God is our strength and Heavenly Father.  He helps His children to overcome the temptations that Satan brings, because God has granted peace and mercy to those that believe upon the name of Jesus.

When the Holy Spirit comes in and takes up residence in a soul, that person will be led into all truths, unlike those that are still trying to find themselves in their own firestorm of pursuit; refusing to go God’s way.  At the very moment we invite Jesus into our heart He becomes Savior and Lord.  The old nature is replaced with a new desire to serve God.

(2 Corinthians 5:17), “Therefore, if anyone is in Christ, he is a new creation; old things have passed away; behold, all things have become new.”

(Revelation 3:20-21), “Behold, I stand at the door and knock.  If anyone hears My voice and opens the door, I will come in to him and dine with him, and he with Me.”  vs.21 “To him who overcomes I will grant to sit with Me on My throne, as I also overcame and sat down with My Father on His throne.” 

We have a friend in Jesus.  There is no reason to allow Satan to rule our life and cause us to suffer feelings of rejection, because Jesus gave His life as a ransom for lost souls that are trying to find themselves.  He is the only salvation that we have.

Written by,

Papa Boyd