Have you ever said something that you regretted later; words that need
not have been spoken, but you said them anyway?
The moment they parted the lips, “I shouldn’t have said that” pierced
the mind, especially after seeing the affect that unrestrained words had on the
other person. This is the problem with
an unbridled tongue.
A person can speak words of life that will encourage souls, or words of
death that cause hurt, which may tear down self-esteem and self-worth in
others. It is shameful how some people
are quick to express their “brilliant” opinions and ideas, yet, fall short of
the mark in learning the art of weighing their words before speaking.
My mom always said, “If you don’t have something nice to say, don’t say
anything at all.” Words can cut like
knives; slicing to the very soul of those on the receiving end. Harsh words can destroy another person’s
confidence in themselves; causing them to lose hope regarding life’s
challenges.
I believe people can absolutely learn how not to offend others, and I
am convinced that some choose to reject such notions altogether, because they
like to hear themselves talk. For the
sake of argument, perhaps certain people are the way they are, because of nationality
or culture. And yes, personality has
much to do with attitude when a person is rude and lacks concern for anyone but
themselves.
Nevertheless, I believe the preceding justifications are mere excuses;
cop-outs that people use when trying to cover up the truth of their unconcerned
nature. There are those that are quick
to blame everything and everyone under the sun for the way they are, so much so
that they live in a world of their own making, not caring that they berate
others with words that cut to the very core of inner feelings.
In my opinion, “I can’t help it” or “I can’t change” are weak excuses
for not making the needed changes in the way people talk and how they treat
others. I call these types of
individuals, bullies, which torment and browbeat those around them. They remind me of the bullies in school that
picked on everyone as they strutted down the hallways on campus.
They needed a good kick in the pants, figuratively speaking, early on
in life, or better yet, a caring, male figure to come alongside them and give
direction; showing compassion and love.
I remember a courageous, brave soul that was tired of being verbally
abused and pushed around and punched the bully in the nose.
You may be appalled to even consider causing another human being
discomfort by giving them a bloody nose; and I know this is not the way to
settle problems, but for this boy it worked.
It helped his state of mind and he was no longer picked on. In fact, the bully and I became good friends
after the incident occurred.
Bullies are seldom challenged or set in their place. They are allowed to expel words that cut
deeply, without facing the consequences for their abuse. Most of them have foul mouths, with tongues
that are hard to tame, but not impossible with God’s help. The Bible says that the tongue is the most
unruly member of the body and that it sits on hell-fire; full of poison.
(James 3:5-10), “Even so the
tongue is a little member and boasts great things. See how great a forest a little fire
kindles!” vs.6 “And the tongue is a
fire, a world of iniquity. The tongue is
so set among our members that it defiles the whole body, and sets on fire the
course of nature; and it is set on fire by hell.” vs.7 “For every kind of beast and bird, of
reptile and creature of the sea, is tamed and has been tamed by mankind.” vs.8 “But no man can tame the tongue. It is an unruly evil, full of deadly
poison.” vs.9 “With it we bless our God
and Father, and with it we curse men, who have been made in the similitude of
God.” vs.10 “Out of the same mouth
proceed blessing and cursing. My
brethren, these things ought not to be so.”
I knew a man that before he met the Lord and experienced the “new
birth” through Jesus Christ, he had a foul mouth and spoke his mind with no
thought of whose feelings he might hurt.
He was strong willed with an uncaring spirit, not by reason of
nationality or culture, but by choice.
He had an, “I don’t care!” type attitude.
What he needed was a poke in the nose or kick in the pants by the Holy
Spirit, like bullies in school, but Jesus showed him a better way other than
violence. He came along side and showed
him love and compassion, without having to suffer a bloody nose or worse.
Someone told him that Jesus Christ, the Son of God, paid the price for
humanity’s sins by shedding His own blood on a cross for our salvation and that
we need not shed our blood or someone else’s to become Christians. Jesus is the only way to God.
He changed from the unkind, uncaring person that he was to a caring
one. God taught him how to consider his
words before speaking them and to treat others in ways that he wanted to be
treated. The Holy Spirit is teaching
him, every day, how to love with the same love that Jesus loves him.
His tongue is becoming more and more tame and less nasty and hostile as
he grows in grace. Words that once cut
like knives are becoming words of encouragement and hope to others, because of
the change that Jesus made in his life when He forgave him of his sins.
If a person is quick to speak cutting words without considering the
harm they may cause, they can experience a new way of thinking and possess the
wherewithal to push away the old nature and mature in Christ, while developing
and evolving into the new nature of godliness.
(Proverbs 15:1-2) “A soft answer
turns away wrath, but a harsh word stirs up anger.” vs.2 “The tongue of the wise uses knowledge
rightly, but the mouth of fools pours forth foolishness.”
Don’t take my word for it. As my
dad would say, “Try it you’ll like it.
You don’t know what you’re missing.”
He was talking about food, but our Father in heaven wants everyone to
try Him and see if He is not the answer that they have been looking for.
Those that try the Lord will walk in newness of life, because they will
have found the missing piece in their needy existence. A new walk and a new talk are the positive
changes that God makes in a life. The
Holy Spirit mellows nasty words that would normally cut like knives; replacing
the old nature with a renewed one.
(Proverbs 25:11), “A word fitly
spoken is like apples of gold in settings of silver.”
Written by,
Papa Boyd