Wednesday, June 11, 2025

Responsibility vs. Accountability

We need to pray for a Holy Ghost filled revival to sweep across our nation and touch the hearts of the youth in America, tomorrow’s leaders.  The parents of these kids need our prayers as well.  This writing is merely food for thought to anyone with an open mind; no condemnation intended.

Watching the youth of today and listening to how they rattle off certain words of filth in the presence of women is despicable.  The disrespect they show to teachers, police officers, authority figures of any kind, including their own parents is shocking.

It’s hard to grasp, with understanding, what is happening to this generation of youth.  I can only speculate.  We must be going into the end times spoken of in the Bible; the beginning of sorrows where children become disobedient to parents and the love of many shall wax cold.  (Matthew 24:3-44) 

The rude and untamed tongues of some of the youth show their rebellious attitudes and contempt for authority through the words they use and the unacceptable deeds they do.  It doesn’t matter where they are or who hears their foul mouths, they don’t care.

These kids have someway lost, misplaced, or haven’t been taught the value of shaking hands with ‘an allegiance to kind-heartedness’ and the importance of respecting others, hence the Golden Rule.

I’m not saying that all kids are like this, far-be-it, but it is apparent to me that things are not as they once were; miles from them.  Rebellion is raising its ugly head like never before.

I was taught to respect my elders, and those having authority over me, especially Mom and Dad.  I certainly did not talk back or disrespect them lest I suffer the consequences of my harsh words and uncontrolled attitude. 

Disobedience didn’t happen, because I was raised with integrity to treat others the way I wanted to be treated.  I cared how people perceived me, and yes, I had trepidation regarding punishment, if you know what I mean.  I knew where the line of demarcation was, and I didn’t cross it.

Trying to reason in my mind why today’s generation of children and young adults are the way they are, it seems to revolve around a common denominator that is becoming more prevalent as time goes on.

I suspect that some parents are finding themselves subject to the wants and whims of their kids, while trying to be their friend.  These parents would rather give into their child’s demands than to rock the boat and disappoint them in some way.

I understand the frustrations that accompany parenting at times.  It’s hard work that is not appreciated in many cases, but worth the effort when a child expresses moral values, principles, and above average ethics.

Expecting, or in some cases, insistent on respect from children requires verbal requests with action to support the expectation, which takes wisdom and follow-through.  Kids become accustomed to empty and shallow words that have little or no impact, because there is a lack of consequences coupled with enforcement.  Kids are quick to find their parent’s number, figuratively speaking, pitting one parent against the other.

I’m not talking about the nonsense of, “Do as I say not as I do” type regiment.  Children learn by example and through the teaching of right from wrong, which befalls the parent or guardian to do some soul searching in their own life that involves self-examination that can produce self-control and the example they should be in the home.

It is a grave responsibility to live a disciplined lifestyle before our kids that we expect them to live.  With God’s help we can achieve integrity in our children through prayer and supplication before the Lord.

(Proverbs 22:6), “Train up a child in the way he should go, and when he is old, he will not depart from it.”

There are four words that express my ‘go to advice’ for today’s rebellious generation, “God is the answer.”  The depth of despair that children are experiencing and exhibiting through words and deed shows me how much things have changed from the days of my youth; it’s mind boggling.

I believe obedience and respect are learned.  This process begins in the home at a very young age—the informative years.  But know this, there is hope in Jesus no matter how old a progeny is.  God is still on the throne and prayer changes things when we pray for our children.  It’s never too late for a miracle to happen.

My wife and I did our best to instill good character habits and goodness in our three children, as our parents ingrained in us.  They showed us by their example how to behave and become successful in life.  It took persistence on their part; it just didn’t happen.

It’s difficult to comprehend the number of spoiled kids that are out there.  In my opinion, they need to hear the words, “No, not this time!” with proper follow-through behind the narrative.  Arguing back-and-forth, begging in some cases, propositioning, or asking a child to do something more than once is frustrating.  

Some kids are totally irresponsible, because their parents have allowed this behavior to develop and become habit-forming early on.  Some of these children’s heads are in the clouds regarding most things.  As the saying goes, “They couldn’t fight their way out of a wet paper bag.”  I’m not trying to be curt or brisk.    

I’m sure you know what the word ‘enabler’ means.  It involves caregivers, moms, dads, or guardians that always make decisions for the children under their care.  They insist on taking responsibility away from the child.

Most parents would rather their children not have to suffer any discomfort whatsoever.  They don’t want them to struggle at all, of which I can understand.  We want the best for our children; there is a ‘but’ coming.

But in my opinion, having raised three responsible children, a parent needs to learn when and how to backoff from being an overprotective ‘helicopter’ type parent, the enabler that is always hovering.  It is quite apparent that without responsibility there is no accountability, as I see it.

I believe that children must learn responsibility and be accountable for their own actions in life.  After all, they are the child and not the parent.  They need to know their place in the home, surrounded with love and controlled discipline.

Children should not be allowed to become the authority figure that’s in charge.  I’ve seen parents walk on eggshells around their children hoping not to hurt or offend them in some way.  I know a few parents that find it very difficult to let go of the reigns and allow their kids to learn by their own mistakes and how to work things out for themselves.

Responsibility builds character, self-worth, and self-assurance in the face of challenges that life brings.  Their mom or dad may not always be around, then what? 

An ongoing ‘put out the fire’ type of intervention by those in charge, teaches a child that it’s okay to not think for themselves, that someone else will most likely pick up the pieces if they wait long enough or work the angles just right.

A young person that is always looking for a designated hitter to assume their responsibility may very well be an Achilles heel through life.  This ineptness will ultimately affect children, negatively, to depend on other people to bail them out of situations that they’ve gotten themselves into.

God wants us to think for ourselves and make wise choices, having sound judgement as we walk with the Holy Spirit.  We are freewill moral agents to choose for ourselves what is right and wrong.  We must give our children the ability to make decisions for themselves, while maintaining a visual with open communication.

www.wordsfrompapa.blogspot.com

Written by,

Papa Boyd

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