Woman

Woman is the opposite of man not only in physical make-up, but emotions, character, sensitivity, and above all, a helpmate given by God to man not only to love, but to walk alongside her man to aid in daily challenges that arise.  She provides a different point of view from her perspective that is needed when making important decisions. 

She has a special knack and instinctive sense that assists her mate with reasoning.  In some situations she provides knowledge that is needed for an intelligent, decisive thought process, thus, strengthening his position as head of the family and provider.  I have read in the Bible that there is safety in council.  This is certainly true. 

(Proverbs 11:14), “Where there is no counsel the people fail; but in the multitude of counselors there is safety.”

We, the men of our households, can become so caught up in our daily tasks of making ends meet that we sometimes lose focus of things that are most important in life.   Our hobbies, buddies, and accumulated toys that we’ve gathered for our amusement and pleasure creep in front of what we hold dear to our heart—our family; finding a higher rank in our prioritizing. 

The woman God gave us, in her desire to help, merely attempts to keep some semblance of order in the home, wanting to pull collectively together with her man toward common goals, while trying to show the art of prioritizing things of most importance.  Problems can occur when we allow our desires to rise above good judgment, which cause snap decisions without consulting our soul mate. 

I am prone to act impulsively upon my premonitions and knowledge, therefore, striving to attain more things that clutter my mind, which makes it even more difficult to put things in right prospective.  I fail, sometimes, to listen to my companion’s point of view and sound advice. 

Our helpmate endeavors to keep us on an even keel.  On occasion when they try to share thoughts and ideas about issues that are pending, she is met with resistance from our predetermined mind-set.  Her comments and suggestions go unheard and unheeded.  A wise man is prudent when they pay attention and not reject what is being offered in love, rather than remaining headstrong and wanting their own way. 

Listening to what is being said and learning to give credence to words softly spoken will allow ourselves to decipher that which she may not be saying out loud, but only thinking.  What we hear, between the lines, may provoke serious changes in habits that we have formed.  These silent words might be saying, “Look at me and your family.  Make us your priority.” 

Time passes quickly—there are only so many hours in a day to enjoy the finer things in life, namely her and the kids.  Our babies grow up too quickly.  Soon they will be gone, making a life for themselves.  It will then be too late to build lasting memories of time spent around the dinner table talking with daddy, and enjoying family activities together. 

I’ve heard it said that it’s not the amount of time spent with a person that matters, it’s the quality.  I beg to differ.  I believe it’s the quantity of time that speaks loudest.  It says, “You are most important to me!  Everything else is secondary!”  We need to make time for our loved ones rather than tossing them the leftover crumbs of our affection. 

When we listen closely to the unspoken words they are actually saying, and we act in love and understanding, the divorce rate in our land will plummet.  Children that are looking for love will find it at home, because both Mom and Dad are there to provide it.

Business transactions that can wait until tomorrow; time spent with buddies and friends; sports, hobbies, and any other thing that steals precious time away from our wife and children are sending messages loud and clear.  This insensitive behavior is saying, “You are not as important to me as you once were!”  Before long they feel taken advantage of and spurned.  The inconsiderate gestures shown to them become unbearable; causing feelings of being taken for granted. 

There is a time and a place for all things, but when husbands fail to act upon the inner awareness that the Holy Spirit is speaking to them, and continue to do their own thing without regard to their spouse’s feelings, these men need to ask this question, “Am I being the total husband and father that God called me to be?” 

What is it going to take for closed eyes and deaf ears to be opened?  It is not too late to show how important our mate and children are to us.  It takes effort on our part.  As we put ourselves in her place, and reverse roll-play our positions, we will feel her aching heart.  We see and know how far we have slipped from the “I Do” that we said to her.

Are we married to our job, the guys we associate with, or the toys that we’ve accumulated?  Have they become more important than the one sitting at home waiting for our return?  How long did we wait to find the right woman to call our own?  Don’t make her wait in frustration, wondering why you have changed.

We are to love our wife as Christ loved the Church.  He showed His love not only in word, but in deed.  He gave Himself unreservedly, because His focus was and still is on His bride, the Church.  Jesus gave His life for her and the sins of all mankind. 

(John 3:16), “For God so loved the world that He gave His only begotten Son, that whoever believes in Him should not perish but have everlasting life.”

When we evaluate how far down the list of important things that we have placed our family, and consider what memories that we want to instill in our little one’s that God blessed us with, we will make a choice.  It will either be to continue down the path that we have chosen; making up excuses as to why we must continue down this path; or we can establish new ground rules for ourselves and act upon that which we know is right.

When changes are implemented, friends, toys, and those ongoing hobbies will still be there, but they have found their rightful place in our life, because they were positioned second to God and family rather than first.  When we love our family as Christ loves the Church, many wonderful dividends follow.  What goes around comes around.  We reap what we sow.

(Proverbs 31:10-28) “Who can find a virtuous wife?  For her worth is far above rubies.  The heart of her husband safely trusts her; so he will have no lack of gain.  She does him good and not evil all the days of her life.  She seeks wool and flax, and willingly works with her hands.  She is like a merchant ships; she brings her food from afar.  She also rises while it is yet night, and provides food for her household and a portion for her maidservants.  She considers a field and buys it; from her profits she plants a vineyard.  She girds herself with strength, and strengthens her arms.  She perceives that her merchandise is good, and her lamp does not go out by night.  She stretches out her hands to the distaff, and her hand holds the spindle.  She extends her hand to the poor; yes, she reaches out her hands to the needy.  She is not afraid of snow for her household, for all her household is clothed with scarlet.  She makes tapestry for herself; her clothing is fine linen and purple.  Her husband is known in the gates, when he sits among the elders of the land.  She makes linen garments and sells them, and supplies sashes for the merchants.  Strength and honor are her clothing; she shall rejoice in time to come.  She opens her mouth with wisdom, and on her tongue is the law of kindness.  She watches over the ways of her household, and does not eat the bread of idleness.  Her children rise up and call her blessed; her husband also, and he praises her.”

Written by,

Papa Boyd